Screw you, Amazon and Google

Posted by Shannon Haddock on September 25, 2014 in Rants |

I try to keep this blog professional and only related to my life as a writer, but this time I really need to vent where it might be seen.  Besides, ranting about the Kindle app for Mac not working is sort of related to writing.

Yesterday I opened my Kindle app and started to read a book. Everything worked just fine. I closed the program and went on about my day.

Today, I opened it and it told me to register. Since “forgot your password” was an option, I assumed this was just the stupidass version of a login screen.

Nope! It opened a Kindle library with nothing but a couple of free books in it!

Much crying and cursing later, I found where the other books are stored on the hard drive, at least, so I can open them. But there’s one very annoying problem: Amazon IDs are the filenames, so I have no fucking clue what anything is.

So, I did what anybody does in a situation like this: I googled my problem. First match was Amazon’s troubleshooting page for the app. It’s utterly, totally, and completely useless. That’s not redundancy; that’s really how useless it is. Most of the other matches were about problems with iBooks and Nook. Because somehow putting “reauthorize Kindle for Mac” into Google matches “Nook for Mac won’t sync”. I’m getting really tired of this sort of thing.

Google, if I type particular words in the search bar, it means I want to search for those fucking words! Quit trying to be smarter than me. You aren’t. Keep this shit up, and I’m going to give Bing a try.

Amazon, don’t bother with having troubleshooting pages if they only are going to list problems that I’m pretty sure my baby niece could manage to solve. Congratulations. This was your last chance after several screwups. I’ll only be using your app for books that … no, wait: I’ll see if Calibre does a good job of converting books that are only available for your app to .epub. If it does, then I will not be touching your piece of shit app again.

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